Chapter Two
STRAWBERRY REPRISE
Wed. July 13th
Bonjour Meme,
The air is heavy and suffocating. I'm worn-out. There's no way out. I'll fade from everyone's minds; it's best for everyone, that I be a distant memory, less painful. And I'll be here, trapped, doomed to struggle, suffer, and die.
I found his earbuds. I know they're his because they're red. He was here. Less than a week ago. Miles was here. And God made sure I was too sick to make it to the door. He was pounding on the door and screaming my name, hoping I was inside; and I was sleeping, and dreaming what I should have been realizing.
What's the point, meme?
I'm back inside the driftwood shelter at Strawberry Sand, I'll stay until I don't feel worn out. I tried to get Me' Loss to stay with me, but she'd rather chase sand birds on the beach. I spent all day yesterday moving driftwood to the altar site, to what avail? I'm doomed. I'm tired of the rain. I'm tired of the tears on my notebook. I'm never going to see ma mere again.
I didn't think Miles cared enough about me to search with papa and ma mere. Miles dropped his red earbuds on the sand where the beach meets the trail; why didn't I see the earbuds when I was mapping the area? It was Miles at the door, shouting my name. Why didn't I wake up? Meme, why does God hate me?
I don't have much hope anymore.
Try to sleep well.